Repost: Teenage Bullying Needs to Stop! The Problem and Real Solutions!

The subject of suicide is usually discussed after a tragic event.  The schools gather students, parents and counselor's together in an attempt to prevent lawsuits, follow protocol and to keep the loud opinionated parents quiet.  This sounds cynical, but where were these sessions of love when the victim needed help?  The schools and parents will say they were doing the best they could.  "We have a tight budget and can only provide limited services."  "We had to work and we did not know things were this bad."  "I knew he was upset, but I thought he would be okay."

As a parent, I have to admit, suicide is a subject that has rarely been covered.  I am a part of the majority and we think our children are perfect little angels.  We think our children never swear, use drugs, drink or have sex behind our backs.  It is this kind of thinking that puts our children in danger.  It is this kind of thinking that approves school budgets without proper support for our children.  It is this kind of thinking that makes it impossible to have honest conversations with ourselves, spouses, children, teachers and others.  We walk around with blinders on as our children are crumbling right in front of our eyes.

Center for Disease Control, Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance System (2009)

13.8% of high school students have seriously considered attempting suicide
26.1% of high school students felt sad or hopeless.
10.9% of high school students made a plan of how they were going to attempt suicide
6.3% of high school students actually attempted suicide 

These statistics tell me parents and schools should be more proactive.  Teenagers that do drugs and struggle with depression seem to be the likely suspects.  However the research shows more and more lesbian and gay teenagers are turning to suicide. 

What is the Problem?

Grades have become a greater concern than the emotional well-being or character building of our children.  Parents compete and brag about the accomplishments of their children.  Some parents are even compelled to lie and find it embarrassing when they perceive their children as inadequate.  Schools are trying to maintain numbers and are focused on maintaining educational standards.  But what about the children all this is being done for?  Is the business of trying to elevate them alienating them?  The spiritual and psycho-social development of our youth is being neglected.

If you do not see these videos, they must be viewed on the Empowered Peace Website

A video written and performed by this talented teen via YouTube

Solutions

1. Family.  Families are broken.  Single parents, teen parents, grand parents raising their grandchildren do not have SUPPORT!  The foundation of a family is two parents working together.  Most families rely on two incomes, but if you have children try to sacrifice.  One parent stay at home and create a home.  If you are single you can still designate a family day.  Eat dinner together without the television.  It may seem awkward at first but your children will feel more loved.  They will feel they are apart of something that matters.  
2. Talk to schools and government.  Let them know about your concerns and ask them what they are doing about the problem.  Write letters to your senators and mayors about teen suicide.  Create programs in school.  For example, instead of having homeroom, have Homeroom.  A class period that students have a safe place to discuss their problems on a daily basis.  
3. Parents work out your emotional disconnections.  You can have family time, but without a real space for emotional growth, it will not work.  Parents look at yourselves and deal with your past hurts, insecurities and fears.  As you heal, you can better handle the needs of your children.
4. God.  Invite God into your family.  There are some things man can not fix. 

Signs a Teenager could be Suicidal

• They talk about suicide.  Even if it seems to be a joke.
• They are having problems in school with bullies.
• A change in personality. 
• They are using drugs and/or alcohol.
• They give away their important belongings. 
• They write or journal about death. 
• Appearing depressed or sad most of the time. 

National Suicide Prevention Help Line
1-800-suicide
1-800-784-2433

Resources for Suicide Prevention and Information

suicide.org

MedicineNet.org: Teens, Parents Underestimate Teen Suicide Risk

KidsHealth- from the health experts of Nemours

American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry: Teen Suicide 

American Academy of Pediatrics: Preventing Teen Suicide

photos via: health.ninemsn.com.au, the-parents-magazine.com, us.reachout.com, troubledteenhome.net via Google images

Segragation Still Exists!- A Pennsylvania School Separates Black Children to Help?

If you are unable to view this video please follow this link

A Pennsylvania school is approaching their problems by separating their students.  The students are being taken away from the regular school population based on their race.  This system although well intentioned, raises many concerns.

The message being sent to students, the community and the world is black children need special help.  The problems the school district is trying to address are experienced throughout every demographic.  It would seem a separation would be based on need, not color.

Bringing together students based situational criteria would be an opportunity for students and the community to learn about each other.  Knowing different cultures have the same problems allows for understanding and creates harmony.  Not to mention years of civil rights battles fought for integrated and fair school systems. What are your thoughts?

Huh?  Pennsylvania High School Segregates Students by Race and Gender.
photo via: the-savvy-sista.com via Google images

The Corruption of Our Youth- The Destructive Influences that are Impacting Their Lives

Today was one of the most uncomfortable, awkward and disagreeable afternoons of my life.  My daughter came home with a baby and I am not happy!  She proudly sat her 'son' down and removed the blanket from his head.  Then she removed him from the baby carrier and rocked him in her arms.  By this time I was cringing!  Then she had the nerve to ask me "will you watch him while I take the dog out?"
"What?"
"No Way!"
"I am not helping you do anything!"  "It is your baby, you figure it out!"
She reluctantly put the baby back in the carrier, leashed the dog and took them both out!

My daughter's baby is not real.  It is a simulation doll given to her by the school.  They are supposed to get a real life experience of parenthood.  This baby had to be named by my daughter, she has to change its diaper, feed it, dress it, console the baby when it cries and take it everywhere she goes.

I have never seen my daughter more excited about a school project.  She is a high school senior and this seems to be the highlight of her year.  One of the main concerns I have about this project is the promotion of single parenthood.  If this is a real life experiment I think the kids should be working with a partner.  They should make decisions together and share the responsibility.  My daughter's teacher rejected the idea of doing the project with a 'spouse.'  What kind of lessons are they teaching?

To make matters worse one of my daughter's favorite programs is, you guessed it, "Teen Mom."  This reality show follows the life of teenage moms and their struggles as teen moms.  One of the moms got pregnant a second time and they recorded her abortion!  Our youth are being corrupted!


What about The Disney Channel and Nickelodeon!   This programming is geared towards children between the ages of maybe 3 and 17.  The stars of the show are the kids and they are just disrespectful!  They lie to their parents, yell at them and basically treat them like fools.  The worst part is the parents laugh at their treatment, leave the room and the kids continue with their bad behavior.  It is hard to find the humor.  Then you have the sexual tension between 12 year olds!  They fall in love, kiss and get their feelings hurt.  The boyfriend/girlfriend relationship is the central theme of most of the lives of the networks characters.  The lessons being taught here are corrupting our youth.

Last but not least, the entertainers!  Sex sells, but too the kids!  The sexual curiosity is aroused in our children at an early age.  They see Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Lindsey Lohan, Miley Cyrus and Jessica Simpson.  They started off as young, innocent and wholesome, but everyone knew what was coming.  It is as if the world waited for these girls to turn 18 and become media 'playmates.' Sexy outfits, bumpin' and grindin' is the norm and their fans are 11 years old.  Not to mention the trauma these stars themselves suffer. 


I know responsible parents try to protect their children, but the things the kids learn at school.  I think we have come full circle now.  I began this article with school and here it ends at school.

Our kids need us to be good role models.  They need us to guide the way because they are being hit with corrupt messages from every side.  Please understand, I do not completely knock "Teen Mom" or the baby simulation experiment.  I am asking for balance.

Much of the subject matter covered in reality shows like "Teen Mom" are simply the truth about American youth.  But is the content in today's fictional media producing the troubled teens that appear on reality shows?  How can we begin to impact the people who produce content for our  children?  What is the proper standard?  How are we creating an Empowered future for our youth?  These are some serious questions that need to be addressed and we as parents and citizens of the world have the power to make a difference!
photos via: mindnumbedrobot.com, troubledteenshome.net, flowtv.org via Google images. 

Reality Check: Your Teenager Could Be Suicidal- A Reader's Request

The subject of suicide is usually discussed after a tragic event.  The schools gather students, parents and counselor's together in an attempt to prevent lawsuits, follow protocol and to keep the loud opinionated parents quiet.  This sounds cynical, but where were these sessions of love when the victim needed help?  The schools and parents will say they were doing the best they could.  "We have a tight budget and can only provide limited services."  "We had to work and we did not know things were this bad."  "I knew he was upset, but I thought he would be okay."

As a parent, I have to admit, suicide is a subject that has rarely been covered.  I am a part of the majority and we think our children are perfect little angels.  We think our children never swear, use drugs, drink or have sex behind our backs.  It is this kind of thinking that puts our children in danger.  It is this kind of thinking that approves school budgets without proper support for our children.  It is this kind of thinking that makes it impossible to have honest conversations with ourselves, spouses, children, teachers and others.  We walk around with blinders on as our children are crumbling right in front of our eyes.

Center for Disease Control, Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance System (2009)

13.8% of high school students have seriously considered attempting suicide
26.1% of high school students felt sad or hopeless.
10.9% of high school students made a plan of how they were going to attempt suicide
6.3% of high school students actually attempted suicide 

These statistics tell me parents and schools should be more proactive.  Teenagers that do drugs and struggle with depression seem to be the likely suspects.  However the research shows more and more lesbian and gay teenagers are turning to suicide. 

What is the Problem?

Grades have become a greater concern than the emotional well-being or character building of our children.  Parents compete and brag about the accomplishments of their children.  Some parents are even compelled to lie and find it embarrassing when they perceive their children as inadequate.  Schools are trying to maintain numbers and are focused on maintaining educational standards.  But what about the children all this is being done for?  Is the business of trying to elevate them alienating them?  The spiritual and psycho-social development of our youth is being neglected.

If you do not see these videos, they must be viewed on the Empowered Peace Website

A video written and performed by this talented teen via youtube

Solutions

1. Family.  Families are broken.  Single parents, teen parents, grand parents raising their grandchildren do not have SUPPORT!  The foundation of a family is two parents working together.  Most families rely on two incomes, but if you have children try to sacrifice.  One parent stay at home and create a home.  If you are single you can still designate a family day.  Eat dinner together without the television.  It may seem awkward at first but your children will feel more loved.  They will feel they are apart of something that matters.  
2. Talk to schools and government.  Let them know about your concerns and ask them what they are doing about the problem.  Write letters to your senators and mayors about teen suicide.  Create programs in school.  For example, instead of having homeroom, have Homeroom.  A class period that students have a safe place to discuss their problems on a daily basis.  
3. Parents work out your emotional disconnections.  You can have family time, but without a real space for emotional growth, it will not work.  Parents look at yourselves and deal with your past hurts, insecurities and fears.  As you heal, you can better handle the needs of your children.
4. God.  Invite God into your family.  There are some things man can not fix. 

Signs a Teenager could be Suicidal

• They talk about suicide.  Even if it seems to be a joke.
• They are having problems in school with bullies.
• A change in personality. 
• They are using drugs and/or alcohol.
• They give away their important belongings. 
• They write or journal about death. 
• Appearing depressed or sad most of the time. 

National Suicide Prevention Help Line
1-800-suicide
1-800-784-2433

Resources for Suicide Prevention and Information

suicide.org

MedicineNet.org: Teens, Parents Underestimate Teen Suicide Risk

KidsHealth- from the health experts of Nemours

American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry: Teen Suicide 

American Academy of Pediatrics: Preventing Teen Suicide

photos via: health.ninemsn.com.au, the-parents-magazine.com, us.reachout.com, troubledteenhome.net via Google images

A Teenager's Thoughts: Pregnancy, Abortion, Sex and Peer Pressure, All Before Age 13!

"Mom I'm pregnant" are the words almost every parent of a teenager, is afraid to hear. Unfortunately teen pregnancy and abortion rates have increased for the first time in 10 years. The Guttmacher Institute reported this 3% increase in teen pregnancies across all races.


Alexis Ware, a high school senior attends a school where pregnant students are ordinary. Here are her thoughts on the subject.

Author: Alexis Ware
Teen Pregnancy is an epidemic on the rise in the United States. The statics are getting higher everyday. Schools try to stress abstinence and safe sex but it isn't working, teens continue to get pregnant. The school is not the only responsible party, home life also plays a big part. There is only one way to stop this problem and that is to stop having sex. This sounds like an easy solution but peer pressure makes this choice almost impossible. The decisions about keeping a baby or having an abortion is another big problem on its own. It puts stress on the teen, the teen's parents and everyone who is involved.

When a teen becomes pregnant it affects both the boy and girl. You have to grow up early and you face consequences like dropping out of school or financial instability. Teens who are pregnant may also lose their relationships with their parents, it is hard to find work without a babysitter. All this stress isn't just put on the girl; the boy also feels the same emotions and loses opportunities.

When you are a pregnant teenager you are faced with one of the most difficult decisions of your life. What do you do about the baby? Should you keep the baby or choose another alternative?  Most teens keep their child, for those that don't they have the option of adoption or abortion. In my opinion, abortion is a form of murder and should be illegal. I think that the best option for a pregnant teen with an unstable household, no support or money is adoption. When you do this the baby has a better shot at getting everything it needs and you can still enjoy your life as a teenager.

Teen pregnancy in 100% preventable. The best way to prevent it is not to have sex. This also prevents getting sexually transmitted diseases such as HIV, chlamydia, herpes and many others. I know some teens do not have the will power to say no, if you make that decision to have sex make sure you use protection. A lot of teens feel the need to do it because of peer pressure or they just want to know what it is like. These are not the right reasons to have sex. The safest thing to do is have sex when you are prepared to care for children. I also think parents should talk to their kids about sex.

It is your responsibility to protect yourself and your partner. Having a baby is not what the media makes it seem.  You now have to take care of another human being, think about it.

Talking to Your Teen About Sex

Talking to your teen about sex can be uncomfortable, but it is necessary.  The greatest influence in your child's life is you.  Not talking about this subject with your child can be interpreted as indifference.  Your teen is also left to learn about sex on their own and subject to unreliable sources.  They go to friends, learn from the media and infer healthy sexuality from their culture.  They need to hear about your beliefs regarding teenage sex and relationships.  A good place to begin a discussion about sex is to reflect on your values and determine the message you want to deliver to your teen.  Another important step in preparing for this conversation is anticipating questions your child may have and determining your answers ahead of time.  For example, your child may ask about your personal sex life.  Having your boundaries set before the conversation happens will allow you talk with sincerity and gentleness. 

Pay attention and capitalize on teachable moments.  Your child is always communicating a message, look, listen and don't be afraid to speak into your child's life.  This is your God given right and responsibility. 

!!!WARNING!!!

EVEN YOUR CHILD IS THINKING ABOUT SEX, TALKING ABOUT SEX AND MAYBE HAVING SEX.  YES EVEN YOUR DEAR SWEET SON OR DAUGHTER IS CAPABLE OF MAKING MAJOR MISTAKES THAT CAN CHANGE THEIR LIVES FOREVER.  DENIAL IS NOT THE PLACE PARENTS OF TEENS SHOULD LIVE.

Get involved with your child's life and try to keep open communiation at all times.  Social media is a great place to stay in touch with your teen.  Facebook, Twitter, My Space and text messages all tell a story of your teens public and private life.  Your teen needs a parent not a friend.  With patience, prayer and hard work you can make it through the teen years without a grandchild and have Empowered Peace!

Resourses

Teen Pregnancy Statistics (This website has great information)

The Right Words (An article about speaking to your daughter about her body and sex)

The American Pregnancy Association

The National Campaign to Stop Teen and Unplanned Pregnancies

Teenpregnancy.com

Additional Articles

Tabloids Glamorizing Teen Pregnancy

Children, Sex and the Media

Implant to Prevent Teen Pregnancies (Controversial)

photo credits: teenpregnancystatistics.org, thefrisk.com, guardian.co.uk, whisperedinspirations.com, teenagerstoday.com all via google images.