Empowered Peace: bullying

I began to write about a different subject, but my heart is lingering in a different place. I have found myself once again the victim of unwanted bullying and it hurts!

Yes, I am an Empowered woman, a strong woman and a woman that won't quit, yet I find myself weakened by the onslaught of whispers, looks, laughter and jeers.

I find it difficult to get close to people that may or may not be aware of what is happening. You see my bully quickly befriends them and fills their head with poisonous lies. I find myself evaluating if getting close and then having them turn away from me suddenly is worth the trouble.

I know that I am not the only person who is suffering from the woes of adult bullying. I hope that my words and admission give you courage and strength. You are not alone and either am I!

The Dilemma

I have considered speaking to people in authority, but the reality is I may be perceived as the trouble maker. I may not be taken seriously or they my choose to sweep my concerns under the rug. I am not willing to risk another negative outcome at this point.

Confronting my bully is a waste of time. They know what they are doing and find pleasure in my pain. I am not willing to risk more ridicule and lies at this point.

The truth is I feel helpless and I feel like I have no one and no where to turn. I have been chonically bullied on and off over the years. Frankly I am tired and just want to quit! I do not want to be in this situation. I do not want to be subjected to this shame for a year, but my current location is a part of my long term goal.

I hate to let others ruin this for me, but I am spent! The hateful evilness I have endured over the years has wore me down.

What is an Empowered Person to Do?

At this point I will continue on my journey. It hurts like hell and I even shed tears. The road ahead may be rocky and even inflict emotional and mental wounds that will take years to heal. Be that as it may, I value the education I am getting and will endure the shit to reach my goal.

This isn't anything that me, God and Oprah can't handle (said with an honest smile).

I will keep you updated along the way. If you are experiencing bullying, you are not alone! Pull yourself together, cry if you must but do not quit or give up on you!

photo via umbrella-d.com via Google images

The subject of suicide is usually discussed after a tragic event. The schools gather students, parents and counselor's together in an attempt to prevent lawsuits, follow protocol and to keep the loud opinionated parents quiet. This sounds cynical, but where were these sessions of love when the victim needed help? The schools and parents will say they were doing the best they could. "We have a tight budget and can only provide limited services." "We had to work and we did not know things were this bad." "I knew he was upset, but I thought he would be okay."

As a parent, I have to admit, suicide is a subject that has rarely been covered. I am a part of the majority and we think our children are perfect little angels. We think our children never swear, use drugs, drink or have sex behind our backs. It is this kind of thinking that puts our children in danger. It is this kind of thinking that approves school budgets without proper support for our children. It is this kind of thinking that makes it impossible to have honest conversations with ourselves, spouses, children, teachers and others. We walk around with blinders on as our children are crumbling right in front of our eyes.

Center for Disease Control, Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance System (2009)

13.8% of high school students have seriously considered attempting suicide
26.1% of high school students felt sad or hopeless.
10.9% of high school students made a plan of how they were going to attempt suicide
6.3% of high school students actually attempted suicide

These statistics tell me parents and schools should be more proactive. Teenagers that do drugs and struggle with depression seem to be the likely suspects. However the research shows more and more lesbian and gay teenagers are turning to suicide.

What is the Problem?

Grades have become a greater concern than the emotional well-being or character building of our children. Parents compete and brag about the accomplishments of their children. Some parents are even compelled to lie and find it embarrassing when they perceive their children as inadequate. Schools are trying to maintain numbers and are focused on maintaining educational standards. But what about the children all this is being done for? Is the business of trying to elevate them alienating them? The spiritual and psycho-social development of our youth is being neglected.

If you do not see these videos, they must be viewed on the Empowered Peace Website

A video written and performed by this talented teen via YouTube

Solutions

Family. Families are broken. Single parents, teen parents, grand parents raising their grandchildren do not have SUPPORT! The foundation of a family is two parents working together. Most families rely on two incomes, but if you have children try to sacrifice. One parent stay at home and create a home. If you are single you can still designate a family day. Eat dinner together without the television. It may seem awkward at first but your children will feel more loved. They will feel they are apart of something that matters.
Talk to schools and government. Let them know about your concerns and ask them what they are doing about the problem. Write letters to your senators and mayors about teen suicide. Create programs in school. For example, instead of having homeroom, have Homeroom. A class period that students have a safe place to discuss their problems on a daily basis.
Parents work out your emotional disconnections. You can have family time, but without a real space for emotional growth, it will not work. Parents look at yourselves and deal with your past hurts, insecurities and fears. As you heal, you can better handle the needs of your children.
God. Invite God into your family. There are some things man can not fix.

Signs a Teenager could be Suicidal