Remove The Shame of Abuse and Watch Yourself Become a Winner!

Abuse is insidious because it takes away a person's wholeness.  If you have ever known a person before and then after any type of abuse or violent act, you have witnessed this change.  If you yourself have been abused you have experienced this change.  The brokenness of abuse shatters a person's soul and the pieces are held together by shame.

Shame prevents a person from being a winner.  Relationships tend to be stressed because of an invisible darkness that looms inside.  This darkness is like a dirtiness that soils one's self perception.  It becomes a continual struggle to hide this perceived dirtiness from anything a person identifies as good.  Unfortunately a person filled with shame can believe everything and everyone is better than them.   

Shamed people are likely to attract predators because of their feelings of unworthiness.  Their self-talk consistently says they are not good enough.  Some see this as a humble disposition, but it is a deception.  God's creations are entitled to goodness in all things.  This includes relationships, jobs, friends and material possessions.  There is nothing wrong with experiencing the fullness of life.  Being abused does not revoke the right to enjoy the finer things in life.  Being abused means something bad happened to you, but you are not a bad person. 

It should not be a shameful experience to drive the car you love, to have a partner that respects and loves you or to have the job of your dreams.  Shame tells you to humble yourself and give it to someone more deserving.  I am here to tell you.  There is not anyone who deserves it more than you!  Living a good, happy and fulfilling life is everyone's right...even yours, even mine. 

It is important to reverse the devastating limitations of shame.  The grips of it are powerful, but with God, time, patience and help you can become your winning self.  Try some of these tips to break the chains of shame.

1. Identify an Empowered role model.  I was recently watching the biography of Arnold Schwarzenegger.  He was a man that came from poor beginnings, yet made no apologies for his success in life.  He did not let his past limit his future.  Watch your role model's interviews, read their books and create your own success.  
2. Surround yourself with positive things.  Watch constructive television, read inspiring books and listen to uplifting music.  It creates a sense of calm and nurtures a can do attitude.
3. Take inventory of your relationships.  Remove people that tear you down!  If you are unable to fix stressed relationships, stop participating in them.  Monitor your relationship with self.  Treat yourself good.  I heard a quote that I can not place, it said "treat yourself the way you want others to treat you."  Get to know yourself, accept yourself and learn to love you. 
4. Develop a relationship with God.  God is the creator of all things including you.  Who knows you better than the one that made you.  Learn what God thinks about you and make that your truth.  God is able to support and help you through tough times and transitions.  It is His transforming power that renews the soul.  Stay close to Him and allow God to gently love your pain away.  
5. Take care of yourself.  Treat yourself to a special meal.  Get a massage, manicure or facial.  Get a nice outfit.  Watch a comedy and laugh!  

Remember life is a process and every moment you try, you become better.  It is easy to become frustrated because healing from abuse can take a long time.  Be patient with yourself and know everything is alright and you are a winner!
photos via: penn-olson.com, gibbsmagazine.com and provocativechurch.com via Google images

Healthy Eating and Exercise- Why Wait for The New Year?

I have been in this struggle for many years and this year I am determined to win!  I know many of you have the same battle, but how can we win with busy schedules?  What about the cravings?  How can I claim a healthy lifestyle when part of it is out of balance?  I feel guilty about the broken promises to myself, especially when I have won this battle in the past.  This is it!  I am going to eat healthier and exercise! 

When I manage to accomplish the task of eating healthy I always feel better!  I have more energy, I am focused and I am more confident.  How can all of these good things be lost to my appetite for fast food?  When I examine this illogical behavior it becomes painfully clear...

1. I am always rushing
2. It is easier to eat fast food, than cook a good meal
3. Old habits are hard to break
4. I do not plan to eat, it just happens when I get hungry

I have to admit, I am not overweight and this can be deceiving.  I look decent on the outside, but I am more concerned about what is happening on the inside.  I want to be able to climb a flight of stairs without feeling winded!  The only way to accomplish this goal is to expand my healthy lifestyle.  I could start the first of the year, but I think it is best to begin now.  I have been looking at some diets, but they say diets are not good.  I got some advice from one of my physically fit friends, DeShawn Ray Penman.  He said I should start with no sugar and no bread for 90 days!  Yikes! 

What is a junk food junkie to do?  I am starting off slow!  I think the way for me to be successful is to plan my meals out.  I have been looking at the healthy eating websites and some of the meals are not very appetizing.  I can not imagine myself eating goat cheese tacos, yuck!  I have decided to following the recommendations of The American Heart Association.  I have a family history of diabetes and heart problems.  Why not be proactive!

The American Heart Association has a really great tool.  It helps you build your grocery shopping list with healthy food choices.  It is called "My Grocery List."  I have learned that as much as I love cheese, it is best to get lactose free brands.  This is going to be a tough adjustment, but I am going for it!

I will keep you updated.
photos via: womanshealthmag.com, buzzle.com via google images. 

Weight Loss Wisdom with Coach Chelle: Pushing the Limits!

How do you feel about your body?  Have you ever struggled with weight loss?  Are you finding it difficult to maintain a healthy diet?  If you answered yes to any of these questions I have a special treat for you!  Coach Chelle is sharing her weight loss wisdom!  Coach Celle not only transformed her body, but she transformed her life. 

Coach Celle has an amazing website/blog where you can continue pushing the limitations of your life.  Here is a link to find her home: http://www.coach-chelle.com/.  A healthy body is an important key to Empowered Peace!